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Showing posts from March, 2018

The Inky Dark Garden

Walking into the hospital today I passed a few bushes sprouting green buds and a cluster of daffodils and I just had to marvel over God. This plunge into the deep started right before Thanksgiving, when winter was just getting ready to settle in. Coats and gloves and boots and car rides to and from the hospital and radiation and snow mark so many of those first memories. Christmas songs and decor intersecting with blinking lights in hospital rooms and vital signs on screens, so much felt like a choice and disparate with the season of our lives, the mustering up of hope for our own Advent, seeing the flesh of Jesus in a baby, destined to suffer even from birth. January and February speeding on wings of treatment and piled up hospital visits and IVs. And then, the amazing and inevitable happens. Every year. Just when I think winter might actually be here to stay, spring sends out its unstoppable shoots. Cade's scan results came in the day before Spring started. Let's pause and ma

God Answers Prayer

We are so thankful to report that God truly is working a miracle in Cade- and his scans showed each tumor on his lungs have virtually dissolved. You'd think this blog would be the easiest one to write. But this week felt like it lasted a month, and I never had time to sit down and really focus. But! Now is a good time to recount the wonderful works of God, and to say with all my heart that I believe the tailwind of Cade's scan results is healing and faith for every person who reads or hears about him . March 19th will forever be one of my favorite days. When we were first given a scan date, it was written on a little sheet of paper and I was so terrified of it I could not even touch the paper. If I didn't know what a coward I can be before this, I certainly know it now. I find so much comfort in simple verses like Psalm 18, "I love you, O Lord my strength,"  and 1 Corinthians 1 where it says "foolishness of God is wiser than human wisdom, and the weakn

Fully Convinced

Cade is loving life right now and feeling good. He got home from the hospital Friday at noon and has been nonstop since. While he was still hospitalized, he was quickly recognized as the most rambunctious kid there and every time the doctors made their rounds they laughed at his antics, and exclaimed over how he didn't need to be there. He was as wild there as he could be while hooked up to an IV pole. The great part is, I think that stay felt like a vacation to Cade. He got one on one time every day with me, Chad and his Grammy, was mostly fed every meal by one of us, and played Wii or games all day. He asked to go back twice in the first two days he was home. That to me feels like restitution. I am praying he only remembers those parts of this journey. The laughter, attention, and feeling of security. Because of his low counts, we are delaying the five day chemo he was scheduled for this week until next week. About half way through his inpatient stay, I started to believe the